Commodore Ute Guy Defiantly Refuses to Transition into Dual Cab Guy

A Commodore ute owner has bucked the bogan trend and has defiantly declared he will never transition into a dual cab owner like the rest of his people.

Since the decline of Holden, many former ute owners decided to upgrade their obnoxiousness and ride tall in diesel-sooted road behemoths.

Brodley however says he’s not going to give up the dream that easily.. Telling The Times,

“We used to be a proud people. A people that would flog our piece of shit SS’s until we had enough money to buy a Maloo or bankrupted ourselves. Those were the two roads we travelled, none of this dual cab business”

Alas, staunch Holden men are running out of options as the closure of Holden means there vehicles will soon be extinct on our roads.

We spoke to Brodley’s partner who said she was proud of her man for keeping his ute together with sticky tape but felt the transition to a dual cab would be kinder on him. Adding,

“We have our 15th kid on the way and what will happen if his shitbox can’t get us to the hospital? He’s constantly having to fix it and it has certainly had its day. He didn’t speak to me for a week after I suggested he buy a newer Ford ute”

Brodley’s frankly outdated hatred of Ford is another aspect of his personality that screams authenticity.

We spoke to a Ford owner that Brodley abused at the traffic lights the other day. He told The Times,

“You just don’t meet anyone with that fire burning in them anymore. He was legit though. He made several sexuality-related slurs and took 2 police tasers to the chest while screaming about how he’d never drive a Ford”

Stay strong Brodley. One of the last Mohicans.

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