These limited edition Perth Pokemon cards are a must for any avid fan of Perf culture. Move over Pokemon these are Perfemon cards.
Baldivis
A powerful Perfemon from the ex-pat capital of Perth. His attacks are among the strongest and he has plenty of HPs. a Formidable foe!
Scarborough
A formidable Perfemon that’s easily distracted by mirrored services, dance music or 18 year old girls. Best kept for specialist battles.
Mandurah
A wild and unpredictable Perfemon. Use at your own risk! The Forum screech is particularly powerful!
South Fremantle
South Freo has some powerful attacks but is ultimately let down by low hit points. This is a great card to play against anyone who values the contribution science has provided society as they are allergic to her bullshit!
Rockingham
You’ve heard of Charizard now meet ChariSHARD. A relatively weak Perfemon with high hit points but underwhelming attacks – despite how lethal he will no doubt tell you they are!
Subiaco
The power from this Perfemon comes in her unreal defence. Nothing gets past her and nothing can progress on her watch! This is a great card to play if you don’t want to go on the attack. Just block!
Mundaring
A fairly useless Perfemon that isn’t worth catching because you’ll have to head all the way out to Mundaring and that’s where he has a home advantage! Those hills have eyes too!
Balcatta
This Perfemon is tough as nails with high hit points and some of the most fearsome attacks in the Perfeverse. Just try to avoid his lemon offerings! Not possible!
Cottesloe
A genetically blessed Perfemon that has powerful skills to manipulate you to do her bidding. She is let down by her lack of real world experience and crippling entitlement however.
Midland
This Perfemon is aggro but can easily take on damage due to his reckless lifestyle. This is a great card to play against any GT Perfemon who will be absolutely terrified of him. Up the single pegger!
Rotto
The biggest problem with this Perfemon is the fact you’ll have to deal with him if you want him in your collection. His attacks are formidable but his banter about how to do Rotto “properly” will wear you down!
Butler
Under no circumstances should you collect this Perfemon card. You will regret it. His attacks are pitiful and frankly unpleasant. Furthermore, if he loses a battle he will get very creative in telling you how he actually won it.
Iluka
Never doubt the power and intensity of this Perfemon. Very low hit points due to a vulnerability to being asked why her folks moved to Perth in the 90s. However she has some of the most grating attacks on offer.
More Perfémon cards to follow!
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?