BREAKING: VFL sure hopes Eagles’ fans don’t have much on Sundays

In a classic VFL move, the big birds have been handed a fixture for 2024 with more Sundays than an American’s diet.

In a statement to The Times, the VFL said that it was under the impression that “not much happened” in Perth on Sundays, adding,

“Do your shops even open? We’re doing you a favour! Giving you backwater hicks something to do. Yet all we get is complaints and sooking that you never get to watch your team on Friday or Saturdays. Whinge, whinge, whinge!”

The VFL went even further to say that Western Australia and in particular the Eagles of late should be thankful they have even been included in the fixture. Adding,

“We have given you a few Saturday games which will suit you Western bogans who like to drink in the morning because that’s what you’ll have to do if you wanna enjoy a bevvie during your games. We’ve given Freo the same treatment”

It’s not all doom & gloom though, there’s a match in Bunbury at least! On Sunday of course, so you better believe you’ll have to drive all the way back to Perth after so you don’t miss work the next day.

Happy times ahead.