A traffic controller working on the Bunbury Outer Ring Road project admitted that he was shocked to discover his job description apparently extended well beyond mere traffic management.
Having just had another iced coffee thrown at him from a dual cab hothead, he decided to take a break and told The Times,
“Every day I deal with Bunbarians who are absolutely foaming at the mouth demanding I tell them why I’ve caused such a clusterfuck in the area. I tell them that I’m only here to ensure the safety of the tradies on the project by managing traffic flow. That’s when they tell me I’ve ruined their lives with the delays and cost blowouts”
We tracked down a Ford Ranger driver who burst a blue vein yelling at a controller yesterday. He told The Times,
“FUCKEN YOUS GOT ANY IDEA HOW MUCH OF MY FUCKEN TIME I FUCKEN WASTE ON THIS FUCKEN ROAD. I PAY ME TAXES SO THAT CUNNY CAN EXPLAIN WHY ANOTHER ROAD HAS HAD TO BE CLOSED AND WHY A ROUNDABOUT WAS PUT IN ON DISCOVERY ROAD. HIM THAT CUNNY RIGHT THERE ITS ALL HIS FAULT AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
Playing the Devil’s Advocate, we suggested that there was a small chance the traffic controller wasn’t present in the planning meeting when some of these decisions were made.
This only caused the man to get angrier as we went on to explain the contractor supplying traffic controllers isn’t Main Roads WA. He shook so violently from the misguided rage he shat himself.
Nevertheless, the traffic controller has decided to accept his apparent role as CEO of the project and asked us if it’s normal for someone in charge of such a large project to be paid $30 an hour.
We told him that sounds about right.