Fanatic Dockers supporters Claire & John’s beautiful baby boy was safely delivered at 6:05 am and they wasted no time naming the child “Flagmantle Mundy Smith” in honour of the 2022 premiership which is a foregone conclusion.
In true purple passion form, John was just minutes away from getting a Dockers 2022 face tattoo when he got the call from his wife. They were on!
John told the tattoo artist that he would be back as he raced to his car and get Claire to the hospital ASAP. He told The Times,
“What could be more fitting than naming our little 2022 miracle Flagmantle? It’s a bit of an unusual name but have you checked out some of the shit they are calling kids down in Rockingham? This is practically normal”
A close friend of the couple first learned of the birth through a Facebook post and was stoked. Telling The Times,
“John snuck a Docker’s themed Sherrin into the background of the post. It’s truly a sign from the heavens that 2022 is going to be the year of Freo! Of course, we already knew that”
This momentous occasion comes off the back of an interesting “gender reveal” party earlier in April. A guest who attended the party described it as follows,
“Man, it was weird. There was like a pinata of what I think was meant to be Fyfe. Then John fired a torpey right into it and it released all this purple dust. Then John and Claire turned to the group and told everyone they were having a Docker”
Asked whether they were concerned young Flagmantle could cop shit for his name later in life, Claire responded,
“Oh so salty, you Eagles fans can talk about silverware all day long but when it comes to a boy who fully symbolises Freo’s first year polishing the cup you get all sheepish? Go take some ice or whatever it is you do”
We understand John has been making several inquiries about the advisability of taking a 4 month old child to a Grand Final. Adding,
“If we have to leave Flagmantle behind we will. It’s as simple as that but ideally, we’d like to have him in the purple army cheering on the boys. He’ll be CHF one day, you know?”
Cheers young Flagmantle may you be the omen that your parents hope you are.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?