The cost of living crisis affects us all. For most, it’s the daily grind of essentials such as food, rent and petrol. For others it’s receiving slightly menacing correspondence from a mystery organisation.
You can probably guess which camp the residents of the golden triangle fall into. Check out the letters that are being popped in letterboxes across the western burbs:
The letters are not specific to any resident and popped up in the rich Melbourne suburbs of Toorak etc, in May earlier this year. Consider them a friendly reminder of wealth inequality and a few helpful tips on how to even the playing field.
Time to rate the wealth-redistribution requests in order of likelihood to happen:
1. Give away your cars if you have more vehicles than licence holders in the house – once you get past the 300 series and the Range Rover, the rest are just toys. Perhaps you could snare one as a settlement for a hit & run? 0.5 Triangles / 10 likelihood.
2. hand over holiday homes to long term renters – give up the Eagle Bay pad to some greasy freeloaders? They’ve seen how you “people” party and it ain’t going to happen. Yellowglen Pink in their spa, will you? You sicken them. -1 Triangles / 10 likelihood.
3. give your investment properties to those who are currently renting them – WHAT? And give up the one joy in their life? Negatively gearing the property while simultaneously jacking up the prices so they can offset the stamp duty on another investment property? -100 Triangles / 10 likelihood.
Surprisingly, there are residents in the golden triangle who are fuming that they didn’t get a letter. With organisers clearly deciding that the area north of Stirling Highway in Nedlands was too povo to bother with.
So there you go. No names are on the letter except for an email address [email protected], who claim they are happy to chat.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?