Simone knew something was horribly wrong when she stepped on the bus this morning. In her haste to avoid being late again she’d forgotten to take her large water bottle (and backup bottle) with her.
Knowing she was on her last straw, she decided to bravely push forward rather than return for her supplies. A potentially fatal mistake.
We spoke to Simone who was already considering going Bear Grylls style 10 minutes into the 20-minute commute. She told The Times,
“I always wondered how it was going to end but I guess I know now – baking under the 8-degree sun, body in a state of severe dehydration, all hope lost”
Naturally, the litre of water she consumed from waking up to walking out her door had already evaporated through her cold sweat of panic.
At the 15-minute mark, another office worker saw the distressed woman and offered her a sip from her Stanley Cup. Simone was touched by the gesture. Adding,
“I only meant to take a small sip but I ended up sucking it all down. She wasn’t very happy with me but we both knew we were only 5 minutes away from salvation. With an extra 1.2 litres in me, I knew I had enough water in the tank to make it up the elevator and fill up my emergency Frank Green I keep on my desk, it’ll be touch and go though”
Alas, 5 minutes soon turned into 10 when some peanut decided to cause a bingle on the Causeway. A witness described the scene on the bus,
“Both women rang their respective loved ones and said goodbye. It could be up to 10 minutes before they receive another 2-3 litre dose of water and by then it could be too late. They were banging on the doors to get out saying they just needed to jump in the river and drink it all up”
We can report that Simone did make it to her office desk and required to be left alone for 2 hours while she gave herself a water infusion.
Sadly, the woman who sacrificed the contents of her Stanley Cup didn’t make it.