Nicolas Cage Assures Hollywood That It’s A Dry Heat After Landing In WA On A Spicy One

Hollywood superstar Nicolas Cage landed in Perth today and was instantly flabbergasted by the pure dryness of the heat radiating from the usual place in the sky. 

Having opted to dress in Northern Hemisphere attire, he was a little shocked to be in almost 37 degree heat but was assured by those minding him that it was a dry heat. Nothing to worry about. A spokesperson told The Times,

“Nicolas was born in California so he knows a thing or two about dry heat. He was worried at first that he was going to struggle on the October scorcher until he was reminded that while hot, it was deliciously dry. That made it all better”

Sweating rather profusely on the 28 degree night, Nicolas Cage sent a text home to friends and family to let them know that his acclimatisation had been swift and problem free. A source told The Times,

BREAKING: Nicolas Cage spent several hours eating a peach at the Bunbury Farmers Market on his way Douth

“He was stoked to tell the world that the dryness of the Perth heat was more or less the same as the heat he’s used to in Las Vegas Nevada. He was expecting WA to be a bit cooler this time of year but hey, at least the humidity is spot on”

The legend has therefore sent a message to all his fans and he couldn’t be clearer – Perth is hot but its a sufficiently dry heat. So come one and come all.

BREAKING: South West Locals Stoked To Meet John Travolta

His dry heat message is expected to be a major boost for WA tourism. With many American tourists unable to intrepret weather data and thus being unsure of the nature of the ambient temperature down here.

Well fear no more Americans! A Hollywood star has told you what to think and thats just as good as education, isn’t it? Although please don’t treat this as an open invitation. We still don’t want you here.

By all accounts, Hollywood and everyone wishing Nick well are stoked to hear the news.

RELATED: Nick Cage confuses Jetstar Bali Arrivals for cast of Con Air remake after landing in Perth

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?

$