The Australian Government has boldly implemented a new plan to protect its citizens from encounters with Shepard-loving-sickos.
The plan comes in the form of a Government watchlist that will be overseen by relevant authorities and keep tabs on these culinary animals. A spokesperson told The Times,
“We will make sure that society is protected from these people. That includes the use of tactical interference to prevent BBQs or picnics from going ahead that will involve these pieces of work trying to pass off Shepard avocado dishes as dishes fit for human consumption”
The Government has also confirmed that in serious cases people’s names might be added to a public register if they continue to put others at harm. The spokesperson continued,
“One example was an individual working at a small tier accounting firm that would eat a Shepard avocado rawdog in front of her colleagues. No salt, no pepper, just her and the bland, hard fruit. She would make eye contact with her visibly upset coworkers. Come on, how could we not act?”
Another example we can report is a man who presented to a social gathering with cubes of Shepard avo on little toothpicks. We probably should have given a trigger warning before telling you that.
All in all, this is a great Government initiative.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?