When Adam met Kat on a boozy night out at The Gate they knew they had a special thing going. He was from Spearwood, she was from Bibra Lake, could they make it any more obvious?
Their passion cock-burned with the enthusiasm of two young southerners able to spend time together conveniently. Alas, the dream was about to be torn apart.
With a heart heavier than a fat kid on the Adventure World scales, Adam broke the news to Kat that his lease wasn’t being renewed and that his mate had offered him a room to crash – in Yanchep.
“Where the fark is that?”, Kat allegedly said before a quick google confirmed her greatest fear. We spoke to Kat who was still processing the shock to their relo,
“An hour away off-peak? How’s that even in the same City? Like WTF? I thought about getting him to move in with me but I still live at home and we just weren’t ready. So we had to have the hard talk about life as a long-distance couple”
Adam wasn’t exactly jazzed about the situation either adding,
“I would’ve moved in with her, leeching off people is kinda my brand but I don’t like the way the older brother looks at me when I’m with Kat, he’d definitely try to fight me if he heard any late-night noises, if you catch my drift”
They agreed to facetime each other every day because meeting in the middle was a “bit of an effort”. They plan to meet up every 3 months for a special rendezvous at Crown Towers to keep the flame burning.
Kat was also concerned about the influence the north was going to have on Adam. She told us,
“I’ve been doing some reading and I think it’s highly possible Adam might catch a severe case of Saffa-itis. Or start supporting Man U or something. I really hope the north doesn’t change him too much”
Adam however was able to see the upside in the arrangement. Telling us,
“It doesn’t count as cheating if you do stuff in Yanchep, mate. Practically like being on holiday in another country. My mate reckons he got a blowie under Atlantis once, that’d be pretty cool, Kat would understand”
Just another example of Perth residents dealing with the tyranny of distance. We told the budding couple that in other cities living an hour away was pretty normal and people make it work.
To that Kate merely responded, “yeah but Yanchep? C’mon“.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?