One can barely describe the rush of buying a fancy home appliance. It’s the dream of anyone in their mid 30’s who has officially said goodbye to their youthfulness.
One Perth woman found this out when she decided to splash out on a brand new Dyson vacuum cleaner with the money she’d saved from her untouched splurge fund.
When we met Samantha she had just finished vacuuming her loungeroom for the 5th time today. She told The Times,
“I used to be just like you. Just a nobody with a no name vacuum. Just going through the motions but now I have levelled up. I spent almost a grand on a vacuum cleaner and I’m going to spend every single moment of my life from now on justifying that purchase by spruiking it to my friends”
After the interview, Samantha asked a barrage of questions about what vacuum we used and its respective suction power.
She then spilled a load of flour on the carpet to demonstrate her Dyson’s ability to vacuum up a bit of flour on the carpet.
Admittedly, it was satisfactory, nothing to get too excited about, which Samantha was. She continued,
“How can people even live without an overpriced appliance that has a 70% brand name tax on it? Do other people just accept that they aren’t good enough to own a Dyson? What an ick. Here grab the stick”
By all accounts, Samantha’s friends & family have been avoiding Samantha and that doesn’t appear to be changing any time soon.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?