Unfortunately for Natasha, her 0.05% body fat, a new set of Lululemons and her copy of Eat, Pray, Love has cost her a flight into Denpasar with authorities deeming her too fit to fly. An official at the airport told The Times,
“She was pulling attention-seeking yoga poses in the airport and tucked into a Tupperware container of her own quinoa and greens, there was no doubt about it, she was in an excessively fit state to fly”
Natasha allegedly attempted to demonstrate to authorities that she was unfit enough to fly into Kuta by ordering a pint and attempting to drink it. Officials told The Times,
“It was like seeing Superman try to suck back a Kryptonite and Coke. When she lifted her arm to drink the thing we saw a brand-spankin’ FitBit. Her phone also showed evidence of regular 5km runs. she was far too fit to enter Kuta”
Security staff gave her 30 minutes to belch, slam back 4 Jack n Cokes or pour her skinny tea down the toilet. Having failed these tests she was denied entry.
Ubud community leaders expressed that they didn’t give a shit, “I’m sure she can go and do a basic yoga pose elsewhere“.
How right they are
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?