Pop Tops line of alcoholic beverages quietly scrapped after backlash to Hard Solo

Drinks giant Asahi has quietly scrapped its plans to release Alcopop-Tops after the heat Hard Solo has copped since releasing its 4.5% lemon squash.

After complaints from the public, Hard Solo, also owned by Asahi, has been forced to change its name. With many thousands of angry do-gooders also vowing to boycott the soft drink over its release.

A spokesperson for Asahi told The Times that it heard the public’s concerns over marketing alcohol to kids “loud & clear” and upon reflection perhaps Alcopop-Tops were a step in the wrong direction. Adding,

“We didn’t really expect the backlash to Hard Solo, after all, most memories people have of pub squash is getting a middie bought for you while your parents neglected you at the pub growing up. We thought it was a natural fit but yeah Pop Tops are pretty much the domain of school lunchboxes”

We spoke to a marketing expert who said the AlcoPop-Tops were likely to be a success but attract the “wrong kind of market”. Adding,

“Solo is obviously a grey area as plenty of adults love that sweet nectar but how many adults do you see buying Pop Tops? Parents or paedos mate, no real in-between”

Asahi has promised to focus on its core line of drinks clearly made for children – Cruisers. With many in the industry saying they nailed it with that drink and there was simply no need for make AlcoPop-Tops when they basically exist in Cruiser form anyway.

We spoke to a 7 year old boy who said he was “disappointed” Asahi bowed to cancel culture and scrapped the line. Adding,

“My parents told me that they used to rub a bit of brandy on my gums to help me sleep as a kid! So an AlcoPop-Top could really help me sleep but probably won’t help my bed-wetting much”

So there you have it, the 8% alcoholic Pop Top in a range of delicious fruit flavours will not be released this summer. Truly devastating news.

Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?

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