Enjoy a stunning afternoon in the Government’s boldest attempt to push the limey invaders so far north that they may as well be back in sunny England.
Getting Around
To truly get into the mindset of a Butler resident you must embrace the grotesque expanse and harbour a burning disdain for convenience. To that end, you really can’t go past hiring a stretch hummer for your amazing day out. Make sure you at least pay homage to the traino – the only thing Butler has to hold over their Ellenbrookian neighbours.
Top Experiences in Butler
Life’s a Beach
Beaches are a little bit different on the northern pom-belt. Given the vampiric pigmentation of the locals, you will have the beach to yourself if the mercury tips a blistering 22 degrees. Be warned, however, if the mercury is sitting at a balmy 16 degrees, you’ll struggle to get a spot, as the locals will flock the shores to work on their cooked-cray tans.
Lock Stock and Two Smoking Crack Pipes
It’s kind of like a Guy Ritchie film, except instead of lairy geezas causing mayhem, there are unemployed bogans getting lit at all hours of the day. In fact, you could be fooled into thinking you’d somehow wandered into Bunbury. So pack your favourite tracksuit and get in on some of the public nuisance.
Complain
Butler is a perfect place to bemoan the inadequacies of Australian life. We are no longer a prison, but you get the distinct feeling the English think they are being forced to stay here. Nevertheless, it makes for great fun for the whole family – check out the daily “complaining of the housewives” at Dome Cafe; a must-see spectacle!
Take a Stroll Through the Sprawl
There are so many treasures to find in the vast fields of undeveloped blocks of Butler. Take the time to trudge through the sandy wastelands and reflect upon the perverted manifestation of the Australian dream that this unnecessary suburb so perfectly encapsulates. Maybe pick up a discarded homemade bong and have a cheeky rip while your kids dodge medical sharps.
Local Delicacies
There aren’t fish & chip shops around here, sonny, there are Chippies. Just one bite of a deep fried sausage covered in mushy peas and you’ll be whisked away to the gloomy estates of South London as you get lost in the culinary powerhouse that is English cuisine.
Fashion Trends
New York. Milan. Butler. Choose from tracksuits, Manchester United shirts or Ralph Lauren polos with the giant horse logo on the front. Ladies, capri pants are still in fashion, so show off those shin bones.
Testimonials
“We really got a taste for local life, I almost divorced my husband for making me sit in a car for 50minutes to see a suburb that is essentially just a shopping centre next to a beach” – Mary
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?