A Perth tenant feels they aren’t getting their 800 per week worth on a rental property after their request to fix their only toilet was denied today.
The toilet has been unable to flush for about a week now and as such is unable to efficiently remove human waste from the abode. A problem that the property manager is labelling “a minor inconvenience”.
We spoke to the tenant Samantha who told The Times that the property manager told them to “suck it up” and use the perfectly operational shower next to it like human filth such as themselves ought to. Adding,
“She said that she is advising lots of tenants to just do their business in their shower and wash it away. She says we should see it as our only personal bidet and to stop bothering her with our worthless problems. She then mumbled off on a rant about us being human livestock in the battery farm of capitalism”
We managed to speak to the property manager who told The Times that tenants feel very entitled to their basic living conditions. Adding,
“Are you telling me people don’t chuck a slash in the shower? Are you telling me that every morning thousands of West Aussies aren’t stamping a turd down the drain? Turn it up. Anyway you say that I don’t care but I went and bought her a back-up bucket for when the shower breaks”
The real estate agent then requested the interview go “off the record” and asked if we were in the market to purchase property with a current tenant, saying it was at $550pw but could go for as much as $750pw and we wouldn’t have to worry about workable amenities such as toilets.
It was all getting a little scummy. Having declined the opportunity to milk a human being we spoke to Samantha who was trialling a new system to “manage” in the new circumstances. She told us,
“Now I just don’t eat or drink. Not only will I save money but I won’t have much need for a toilet. It’s called helping out the landlord battler I’m told, it’s about doing my bit”
Blink twice if you need help!
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