A construction site in Perth has been left shocked after habitual liability and full time Kiwi scaffolder “Spyda” took umbrage to a number of minor things while on the job this morning.
By all reports, Spyda was absolutely itching for a biff from the moment he got to work and his temper only worsened as the morning went on.
We spoke to one of Spyda’s coworkers who said his workmate generally removes his shirt after ducking off to his car to blow a few long white clouds of his own. Adding,
“Spyda will try to fight someone at smoko. That’s just a given. Yesterday it was because someone told him that he was never going to get $45k for his piece of shit Navara. Another time, someone was just breathing too loud, according to Spyda”
After being told in no uncertain terms it was his last strike, Spyda was pacing in a volatile manner and muttering about the consequences of messing with a bloke like himself. He told The Times,
“What are you looking at? You WEAK DOG, come on cunny hit me, do it, do it”
We can infer from the interaction that Spyda was still itching for a biff. So we spoke to his supervisor who rolled his eyes so intensely that he almost blacked out. He told us,
“How do I get stuck with these morons? Don’t get me wrong, you need a certain level of aggression to work in WA construction and Spyda impressed me by ripping off his shirt in his job interview. Maybe that was a red flag looking back on it. Told me he didn’t like me prying into his affairs. I was just asking him what his job history was”
With about 3 and a half hours left in the day, there can be no doubt that Spyda will get his man. Whoever that is, whoever is unlucky enough to be standing next to him really.