Perth is turning it on today with a saucy little mid-30s banger. Naturally, as the day heated up, it got people thinking about their old friend they hadn’t seen in a while – the beach.
Now, while a day splashing around and setting up cabana shanty towns sounds idyllic, the reality for many Perth punters was that their day has been spent prowling beach car parks and stalking beachgoers in the hopes of securing an elusive park.
We spoke to Brett who said his family had so far enjoyed 3 hours of beach time while stuck in a Trigg traffic jam. He added,
“Yeah, FML ay? *laughs deliriously* pretty sure the little tacker has shat himself and my loving partner is giving me that i-married-a-loser-stare after letting a Patrol push in and steal a spare park about 45 minutes go. These are the good times”
We spoke to his wife who indeed was struggling to forgive him for the beta display. She told The Times,
“We teach our children that violence is never the answer but deep down we all wanted Brett to get out and unleash the fury of a thousand suns on the park nabbing Patrol rockape. There aren’t many worse things you can do in life than steal a parking spot on a busy beach day”
We caught up with another family that is having the opposite problem – they got in early enough to have a swim but now they can’t get out of the car park due to all the cars staking out spots and generally clogging things up like a Kuta toilet on a Mad Monday end of season trip.
Authorities warn that the next couple of ripper beach days are likely to be the same and if people are serious about enjoying a day out they should call in sick during the week like a normal person.
RELATED: WA Man Outdoes “Cabana Families” At Beach By Erecting Full Donga Camp
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?