A group of ageing millennial and Gen X teachers have lobbied the Education Department to implement a radical plan to teach disruptive kids a bit of “old school discipline” in the schoolyard.
The idea is to bring back the game of “Barcode Bash” but allow teachers to participate in circumstances when the little shit could use a bit of an attitude readjustment.
Especially given the rise of student violence against teachers – given the students know a teacher is going to ruin their entire career if they so much as defend themselves.
The rules dictate that students form a circle and attempt to keep an empty carton of milk (Spearmint preferably) airborne and the person who causes it to hit the ground gets set upon by the animals playing if the barcode is facing up.
Typically, the “bashing” portion of the event is fairly mild unless you ran like a coward. Thus demonstrating you had no business playing the game and were a class “can dish it but can’t take it” operator.
We spoke to a teacher at a private school who said he was very keen to bring it back adding,
“Do you know some kids are 18 at school now? That’s a man in my eyes and if he wants to call me a loser in front of the class then we can see who the real loser is. I’m 38 and have at least 60kgs on him. Let’s see how he does in a game of barcode”
The Education Department wasn’t convinced at first. Questioning whether bringing back a form of corporal punishment was wise.
However, after watching several hours of the way snot nosed little kids talk to their teachers, the Department was swayed. Adding,
“Obviously we’re not telling teachers to go out and feed students the oos oos. As tempting as that may be. It’s the same physical contact you’d cop on a Rugby field. It’s about old school discipline and why that generation of students turned out the way they did, the barcode was a metaphor for life”
The game will be reintroduced to the school system later this week.
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