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The Bell Tower Times

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Monday, July 07, 2025
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Search Results for: old mate

Local bobtail wants to know if your eyes are fucken painted on mate

October 8, 2023

At 8:30 am this morning, a local bobtail had just finished a healthy session of terrorising a cowardly old lady in her garden. Feeling satisfied…

REPORT: “Your Mate” At It Again

September 30, 2023

In news that no one will find shocking, “your mate” has begun acting like a clown after you took the punt on inviting him out…

Amateur full forward’s Mad Monday still going strong after kicking off in August

September 9, 2023

Amateur full forward and club legend Thommo has smashed another club record after extending his Mad Monday celebration by about 20 days so far, and…

“Bazplay” – Basil Zempilas Appoints Himself Coldplay’s Support Act

August 23, 2023

Coldplay recently put out a search to find some local WA talent to open for them during their two sold-out Perth shows. Naturally, tons of…

Serbian workmate taking a few “Novak” length toilet breaks to avoid discussing Wimbeldon final

July 17, 2023

Jovan, a Serbian/Australian staff member of a mid-tier firm in the city has been deploying tactical “Novak” length toilet breaks today to avoid having to…

Hungover bloke about to risk it all on mate’s couch

July 8, 2023

Local pisswreck and general grub Matty has woken up on a mate’s couch after a heavy Friday night on the froffs. He laid there in…

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