Donald Trump has entered an executive order frenzy on his first day in office.
While his focus was mainly on repealing Biden’s orders, he was asked to turn his mind to the plight of the hill dwelling deadshits who yearn for a place to do nangs and give their fingers a run at night.
An official spokesperson from the Whitehouse told The Times,
“Trump fancies himself somewhat of a world leader. He feels that the sort of people to hoon around Zig Zags after being involved in a teenage pregnancy are exactly the types of people who’d vote for him. So he did it”
The City of Kalamunda is understandably confused by the order. With uncertainty of President Trump’s authority in the hills district.
Nevertheless, Trump has declared that he will mobilise forces should he not hear about the screeching tyres of a Commodore driving lunatic on the scenic track tonight. One man from Forry described the order as “sik”.
More to come.
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