It’s early days but the police are alleging a 15 year old took two licensed firearms to a school in Two Rocks and witnesses at the scene reported a few shots being let off. Thankfully no one was hurt. It was a taste of America that WA so badly wants to erase from its palette for good.
The incident is still being investigated by police but the Government is wasting no time taking action. A spokesperson for WA told The Times,
“Nope, not happening, we are not having that kind of bullshit in WA. That’s American nonsense and we won’t stand for it. Western Australians should be able to go to school without the fear of that happening”
The spokesperson paused to reflect on the mess that America is before continuing,
“We’ll be putting in some of the most advanced geoblockers to de-Americanise society before it’s too late. We are better than that”
Not only will kids get less American garbage mainlined directly into their impressionable heads but the State is also looking for other unflattering US imports that we don’t want. The spokesperson continued,
“Mediocre fast food chains, mumble rap and cars the size of small buses are being looked at too. The Government doesn’t want our rapid Americanisation to happen any faster. McGowan sees it every day, with Rocko turbos walking around in the latest bandwagon NBA guernseys. He’s had enough”
It’s a bold strategy but some believe it may be futile. Especially given our media is desperate to copy the American model. Nevertheless, it’s a noble goal.
Documenting the Human Zoo is thirsty work, so if you enjoyed what you read how about buying Belle a beer, ay?