News that SeaLink Rotto Ferry Services have hit the market has created a real buzz through the western suburbs.
Residents of the Western Suburbs, specifically the Golden Triangle numinously agreed to put in a bid for the service to help reduce the amount of poors on Rottnest Island.
By buying the service and then either scrapping the ferries on the Point Walter sandbar or jacking prices up even further the GT believes they can reduce the amount of outer-suburban, ferry dwelling peasants by 30%.
A spokesperson for the Golden Triangle told The Times,
“How am I to enjoy my crayfish while hearing the impoverished cries from the unwashed masses about the prices? Back to wence you came, vile beasts!”
Another GT resident told The Times that having poors on the island posed an enviroinmental risk too. Adding,
“Why are they always so greasy outside the Western Suburbs? You realise that the grease from their cretinous children’s hands actually seeps into the island and makes it poorer for the rest of us? Ghastly”
They hope the reduced competition will lead to a flow on effect of higher prices across the board. Potentially taking this number up to 50%.
The bid comes after 50 years of failed lobbying for the State Government to make Riviera ownership a requirement of entry on the island.
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