A young Perth hill dweller has turned to his favourite group chat to ask “the boys” for their advice on what he should wear to his hot date this evening.
He said he was torn between showing his extreme side with the Fox Racing shirt (and hat) that he wore to his brother’s wedding on the weekend and his cleanest HiVis to show his date he has a solid income.
A member of the group chat said it was a classic hill dweller dilemma. Adding,
“I told him that you can never lay the motocross on thick enough. His shirt slayed at his bro’s wedding. Especially when he got off his head and started doing the Charlie Cameron dance with full motorbike noises on the d-floor”
Another mate took a contrary view. Claiming you can never go wrong in a good HiVis work shirt. Adding,
“A lot of hills girls have been burned before. Dating a scumbag leech who eventually moves into their folk’s with them and takes over the futon. She needs to know that you’re gainfully employed even if you’re in between jobs atm”
It seems the boys weren’t getting the young buck any closer to a decision. So he decided to turn to his own mother who had never lead him astray before.
She told him that given she’s the one who washes his clothes she’d go with the one that stinks less. Adding,
“His Fox shirt smells permanently of bongs. His work shirt smells like B.O. I told him to take it to the sniff test and for god sake to put on some clean satin boxers! How a boy skids up satin so badly is beyond me!”
In the interest of proper journalism, we decided to speak to some hills girls to ask what they thought. Here is a range of responses we got,
Bianka – “Fox, if he can’t handle a dirt bike he isn’t going to be able to handle me later”
Jessyln – “HiVis, I love a man in uniform and there’s a higher chance he has a bit of gear on him”
Gloria (cougar) – “makes no difference to me, as long as he hasn’t shaved off that ratty goatee and pubey mo, I’m all his hehe. reminds me of my baby daddy’s boy”
Disturbing.
We are happy to report that he is now leaning towards his best Fox shirt.
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